“Night to Shine”….. and that he did!!!!!

What an amazing night… What an amazing event! How many of you have someone with some type special needs and long for them to have a typical night like any other teenager could have such as a prom night? Tim Tebow foundation has created an event for people with special needs to have a prom like event for them to feel special for one night… and for them to “shine”!!!!

We were absolutely amazed at the organization, presentation, and variety of events put together in one evening. We arrived to find that girls were getting their hair, nails and make up done… while the boys were getting their shoes shined and their hair touched up. From there they went and met up with a buddy that they would have for the evening to keep them company. Then on to the horse and buggy carriage ride, and then to ride in a limousine! Once they departed from the limousine they were escorted to a red carpet where there were volunteers lined up on the carpet to root them on and cheer them on and take pictures. As our son said “I felt like a movie star”!!

Then they entered the gala… with white twinkling lights, beautiful tables decorated, a DJ, and I wonderful meal provided by Chick Fil A!

They could dance all night, they could be with their friends all night, they could feel as special as any other person ever felt on a prom night.

The final event… Would be to gather all the people with special needs and their buddies… They would be prayed over, and then everybody was crowned king and or queen of the prom with a beautiful crown or tiara.

No one was left behind and no one was left out during this beautiful moment. Everybody felt like they shined for this one special evening… our son came home feeling like he was worth something so special!!! This is one night he will never forget for the rest of his life!

Lynn A. C. Wilson– Resume of a Mother

Epilepsy and Essential oils….does it really work?

I have dealt with my husband’s seizures and Epilepsy for over 30 years now.  His seizures have changed over the years from the type of seizure that he has, to the length of it and also what triggers it.  It has been a learning process for the both of us.

If you have seizures or live with someone with them….you know the drill.  You probably have struggled at some point yourself with the changes and where it takes you in life!  Let me say before I share any more….YES YES YES we live daily with everyone’s advice as to what meds, what foods, what life style, what we should and should not do etc.….. We are thankful for good friends and people who care, but when they have not lived with this….their advice can be like nails on a chalkboard!  Advice is great when you ask for it but not every time you see someone. Also, choosing a natural remedy… seems to ignite conversation in people who normally wouldn’t even talk to you. “Natural” seems to unnerve people and make them feel uneasy. In our family we tend to choose natural over Medical whenever possible. So this might be an option for you and then again possibly not if you’re not into any type of natural alternatives.

Ok enough with that…the purpose of this blog post is to share something with you about Essential oils that works for us.  This is not a medical diagnosis or a proven clinical fact…this is only what has worked for our family.

At this point in our lives….we have tried all the conventional ways and yes my husband is still on his meds.  But overall….he needs something else.  If you know Epilepsy….seizures cannot always be completely controlled and that is the case with him.

We have tried Essential Oils and we have found success!!!  Frankincense was recommended to us along with a few other oils.  What has worked and is working for us is “Oil of Oregano”.  Yes you might smell a little like a salad but who cares.  It works so well for us that we never leave home without it anymore.

When it is an “off day” for him, a long day, a rainy day, right before and even during a seizure….he/we apply it. You can use it straight on the skin (be careful since this is a hot oil), or as we have been using it ….we make up roller bottles with the oregano and a carrier oil.

Here are a few pics of what we use….I hope this helps you with either a new concept or at least to gives you an alternative to either try or just investigate for your own health.

You will see in these pictures… that you will only need four items. You would need the oil of your choice, a roller bottle, a funnel to help pour the oil into the bottle, and you would need a carrier oil. Once made… we use the roller bottle with the essential oil’s in it on his wrist, on the back of his neck and also down his spine every 2 to 4 hours or as needed.

Feel free to ask questions….if we can help we would love to share with you! We would love to get your feedback as well if you have tried essential oil’s have they been a success or a failure? Which oils have used and how do use them? Do you have a certain brand that you prefer over another and why?

Lynn A. Wilson (and hubby Graeme) – Resume of a Mother

Autism and Routine….

Routine is something hard to create and stick with in our lives….but it is a necessary thing.  I watch a You-Tube channel with “Andrea Mills”.  She talks about doing things routinely if they are important enough to you. Check out her website and channel for this topic and more.

https://www.andreamills.tv

With any type of special needs and we have two types in our family, I find as a homemaker that I need to create a way of organization for them; and not necessarily for me.  With epilepsy and Autism in our home, I find that this affects everything that we do!  For example, just leaving the house to go out for the day…we need to make a list on the back door of what we need to bring with us.  This way my husband who has Epilepsy, whether it be a good day or not, does not have to think about what to bring. Especially when it is an “off” day for him, he just looks at his list on the door.

(example list for the door)

  • travel bag
  • pills
  • water bottle
  • phone
  • phone charger

For our son has Autism.…so for his needs we have created labels in the refrigerator and also a routine of where to put things.  This way there is no frustration of where things go.  We also labeled where all of our coats go.  Again, this way it keeps things simple and organized!

We have created a “white board” system to help with all those daily questions that you find Autistic kids always asking.  They want to know what the next days meals will be 24 hours ahead of time. Our board includes 3 meals, 3 chores, 3 school events (we homeschool), and whatever the special event of the day is also.

This has proven to relieve many meltdowns, and crazy evenings in our home.  When he asks the questions that he always does by 5pm sharp, we can just refer him to the white board.

Special needs can be a struggle to the caregiver as well as the person who struggles with it.  Why not make life as routine as you can to avoid any chaos and confusion.  There will always be other issues to deal with, but when things are routine it helps out a great deal.

Lynn A. Wilson – Resume of a Mother

#Beating the Odds…..My Story of Epilepsy.

Well…..here we are at the end of Epilepsy Awareness Month.  You have heard from me on being the wife of an Epileptic and what is the like for a spouse.  Now let me intro you to my husband who has Epilepsy.  He has struggled with this since the age of 12…he has been my husband for 30 years and has raised two sons, he worked at one point in the medical field, he drove a car, and he was very involved in many areas of life…and now find out where life has left him.  Grab a cup of coffee and take the time to read his story ….right from someone who struggles with a chronic illness daily and sometimes hourly but has found a life within this life and is #beating the odds.

resumeofamother_familyI really appreciate the opportunity to tell my story of Epilepsy in my life and what is like to live this life daily and hourly! Find out firsthand the life that some of us live and how I have adapted to a new norm.

For me it started many years ago… I guess I was about 10 years old. I had been asked to stay after school because of a problem.  I actually had been in trouble at school for something  … so when it was time to leave I jumped on my bike to ride home but I did it in anger.

When I got to the traffic light it was green for me…..but the car on the other side had a red light, and did not stop.  Needless to say the car hit me and I went flying into the windshield with my head getting hit. I can only recall half way across the road and then waking up in the hospital.

Well I was pretty beat up with a dislocated my clavicle, got a big bump on my head and chipped my front tooth.  They decided to keep me in the hospital for a couple of days under observation.  At that time they could only diagnose me with what they thought was broken …the seizures were not noted yet.  It wasn’t until a few years later that I had my first observed seizure…and that is where my story begins….

I sensed things from time to time….but it was not something that I could really explain.  Not knowing that I had a problem…..I just dealt with it the best I could.  It was a hard thing…not being able to explain to anybody what I was feeling or going through.

Not knowing what a seizure was ….I did not know what was wrong with me.  It wasn’t until years later at college that I had a large enough seizure and finally got the help that I needed.  After that….my life completely changed. One major thing that changed was that…. I learned quickly how people will treat you differently when they do not understand what is going on!  People that treated me normal…such as family and friends….now treated me like the hardly even knew me.

People will avoid you for fear that something might happen while you are with them, they are afraid of what to do.  People will just not talk to you since they don’t know what to say.  People will talk about you only feet away as if you can’t hear them…..and yes I can hear you.  They will ask my wife a question to avoid actually talking to me.  I have said to my wife that it’s kind of ironic how some people seem to be able to understand if you have a sugar problem or something else wrong…and they seem to be able to cope with that better than people with a seizure problem. Don’t be afraid of us…..we are just like you with added personality in our life.

People are educated and seem to know the steps on how to care for a person that has a sugar attack or similar …..But when somebody has a seizure… people panic!!!!

I will say that it affects every area of your life, but I will not let it have power over me!!!

A quotation that has always motivated me is and that I live by…

“Look for the good times along the way .You can’t put off enjoying life, waiting for the day when epilepsy is no longer an issue.”

 – Diane H. (Mother of patient)

Epilepsy has affected my marriage in many different areas.  It has affected how I am as a father to my two sons and now daughter-in law. My sense of self-worth is something that I struggle with all the time and trying to fit in the mold of husband and father…..my self-worth takes a back seat.

It is hard to copy-of-file_0001be the head of my home, and someone who my wife can depend on ….because many times my thoughts are not clear. I have days where I know exactly what is going on and then many days where I have to just depend on my wife and children to help direct me.  As a man that is something that is unspeakably hard for me.

After years of struggling and many situations with my seizures…..It has gotten to the point where I finally had to go on full-time disability.  Let me tell you from again a husband/fathers point of view….. it was a definite low point in my life and it took me a long time to get over it!!

I have found that having seizures has given me a unique perspective on life.  I can relate to many people who struggle with chronic illness.  The most useful perspective is with my youngest son who has Autism. Both he and I struggle neurologically with many things, I can so relate to him when no one else can.  This has been a huge blessing for him and also for my wife. It gives her a sense of security…knowing that someone can honestly understand some of what our son goes through.  There are times when both he and I have reacted to things because of our neurological problems and we can relate to each other.  For instance when the weather is stormy… I know it’s going to be a rough day for me, and I know that it’s going to be a tough day for him as well.

One true blessing in the last three years of my life has been the moving to a new church!  I have found a Pastor who accepts me …just as I am.  He is aware that I have epilepsy…yet he is willing to work with me and in doing so this has brought back my confidence and self-worth that I had lost. He always keeps an eye on me and he might come over and say “are you okay?” but I know he has my best interest at hand.  By him leading this way….it has shown the church that I am ok….it has allowed the church family to feel relaxed around me and my family.

It is still difficult though in many other ways. There are many times I have to use an electric scooter rather than walk and worry that I might fall at storecopy-of-file_0008s or other places.

I am blessed have a wonderful wife and family, as well as a strong support group in my church… and some good friends who I can depend on.  I would recommend to anybody that has any kind of health problems whether it is epilepsy or any other chronic illness to make sure that you have a good support group in your life…it WILL make a difference.

How can you help me and others with chronic illnesses….

  1. Don’t stare
  2. Don’t avoid me/us….come talk to me/us.
  3. Don’t talk as if we are not in the room.
  4. Don’t treat us like we are weird.
  5. Don’t act like if you touched us we will seize on you or that you will catch what we have.
  6. Treat us normal!!!!
  7. Treat us with respect!!!
  8. Remember we were created to be a unique person and to carry out the work that God intended. Don’t Judge us for that.
  9. Remember that people with illnesses are not being punished for past sins!
  10. Most of all remember we are a human being with families, lives and feelings. Treat us the same way you would like to be treated.

Feel free to comment below if I can help you in any way.  My wife and I would love your feedback and to hear from you.

Thank you for letting me share my story and if you have not read her Blog yet on being the “Wife of an Epileptic”.…check that article out too.

Graeme M Wilson I – Husband of Resume of a Mother